Hackmaster: Orkin’ Slayin’ Song (Throat Slittin’ Jig)

Det herlege Kenzer & Co-samfunnet

Eg har tidligare skrive om kor stornøgd eg er over å vere del av Kenzer og kompani sitt rollespel Hackmaster, og forumet deira har eit særs aktivt samfunn, med mangfoldige hyggjelege, hjelpsame, ivrige, deltakarar, som alle er der for å gjere dagen og spelet betre for kvarandre. Nokre folk er det så klart som ikkje heilt greier å halde ein god tone, men dei blir raskt moderert av dei dyktige moderatorane. I det heile er det ein flott plass å vere både for alle som er begeistra for rollespela deira, men også for brukarar som har andre rollespelrelaterte hobbyar.

På dette forumet tek eg del i eit spel-per-post-rollespel: Celtic Hill Fort Codwallon. Ein lagar rolla si som normalt til sleke spel, men alt foregår via daglege postar. (For tida er hakkemeisteren sjuk, så det har gått nokre dagar sidan sist, og det kan vere at han no ligg på sjukehuset, men me vonar at han snart blir frisk att.) Siste oppdatering no er at han er heimkomen frå sjukehuset, etter alvorleg sjuke; det gjekk bra, men han var visst nær å døy. Livet er skjørt. Spelet blir oppdatert dagleg av hakkemeisteren, og når me skal i kamp, kastar med terningane og gjev han verdiane våre, som han brukar til å omtale kampforlaupet til oss. I mellom kampane interagerer me med verda og NPC-ane hans. Ein NPC – non-player character –  er ei rolle som ikkje blir spela av spelarane, men av spelleiaren (her: hakkemeisteren). Her er området med spelar i, slik hakkemeister hkingsley presenterer det:

I want to start a new Play by Post game. Your base is a Celtic Hill Fort at the Northern edge of civilization. There are bad things out there, further North. The time is some 20 years before the last game. The folks in the fort are semi barbarian. You can play a barbarian warrior and fit right in. There is no armor heavier than chainmail. Spears are far more common than swords. Wizards are allowed around the fort only with Druid approval. There are Druids. The wizard in the wizard's tower is Eoghan, a middle aged man with a pretty daughter. If you play his apprentice, you can start 1st level 19-21. If you play his son or daughter, you are 1st level at 18. Outsiders follow standard Hack Master rules.

The Celts have no written language, so literacy costs double, unless you are a cleric or a wizard. You may play a Druid. PM me if you are interested.

Possible NPCs or pre-gens include Granwen, an elf fighter, Cadwyr, a human fighter who thinks he's a Bard. He does sing and play a Celtic harp. Cameron, a human ranger, Brendon, a human fighter, Tamsyn, a human female cleric, Catriona, human female fighter, Brother Conner, human cleric.

I rolled up a human female fighter named Fenella, who has 16 strength, 17 looks, and rolled 4 charisma. That would be an interesting role playing challenge.

NPCs include Sam and Jake Ironwood, dwarven weaponsmiths who make really good spear points and axes. They don't do swords, and they charge a high price for their superior spears and axes. Wallace J. Furfoot, a halfling who owns a bakery.

hkingsley

Musikalsk inspirasjon

Medan me spela, etter å ha vore på speidetokt, kom vi attende til fortet vårt, etter å sjølve ha blitt overfalne av tussar (engelsk: hobgoblins) og deretter møtt ein venleg druidisk prest. Speidarar frå fleire kantar meldte oss om eit stort åtak, og same kveld starta det:

The sun goes down behind the low mountains to the West, and it is dark. That is when the drums begin, out there in the dark, North of the North gate. The drummers are close enough to be heard, but far enough to avoid arrows, especially in the dark. Tavis points out that 150 men, guarding a wall 400 meters in diameter, means a man every 7 meters. It is not enough, but we do have wizards.

Kara has emerged from her nap, armed and ready for a fight.
They are going to hit the North wall, most likely, but they would not be drumming like that if they did not intend to hit somewhere else, as well.
You are wise for such a wee lass. says Tavis.
You learn a lot in 170 years. she says.
You don't look a day over 17.
Bless you. She says with a smile. I will be at the South wall, with Sam, Jake, PONTO, and PUP. DESTRAN, you can stay on the North wall and protect your sister. Worst comes to worst, I intend to sell my life dearly, but I intend to kill a lot of humanoid scum before dawn.

hkingsley

Åtaket kom, og alt som kunne krype og gå deltok. Kvinnmenn, ungar og oldingar stod på palisaden og slapp steinar i skolten på utyska som prøvde seg, men etter at trollmannen vår fall, blei ting litt vanskelegare:

PONTO gets 7 hits with 12 rocks, dropping 7 orcs. (Rocks from 30' high are great weapons.) PONTO throws another eight, getting 5 hits. 2 are glancing blows, 2 cause an orc to drop, and the last one splatters an orcs skull. (When I rolled damage, it came up 3, 6, 6, 6, 6.) With 10 dead or badly wounded orcs at the bottom of the ladder, the orcs stop trying to climb it.

Artegan casts a lightning bolt from his spear, hitting 2 fomorians, and another from his hand, hitting 2 more. He throws the red dart, and a large, hot fireball explodes, on the ground below. more than 40 orcs scream in pain and die. A few seconds later, a fireball explodes right over Artegan. A cheer goes up from the orcs, and they surge toward the ladders again.

⋮

Artegan's fireball explodes, killing 40+ orcs. Then Artegan gets hit by a fireball, and goes down. Sam throws a white dart out into the dark. Something down their is encased in ice. The orcs give a cheer after the fireball, and surge forward.

After the fireball hits Artegan, the orcs, who were about to give up, surge toward the South wall again. The folks on the wall pelt them with a barrage of rocks. Many orcs do not make it three steps up the ladder. Sam throws his green dart toward the west end of the 20 ladders, and a cloud of poison gas stops anyone from climbing up. On the East end, the poison gas has dissipated. Artegan, who is not dead, gets to hid feet and throws his black dart to the East end of the ladders. An acid cloud causes much screaming, and no orcs try to climb those 4 ladders. Of the middle 12 ladders, a few orcs are making it up the ladders.

Make some combat rolls.

hkingsley

Eg måtte gjere noko, så eg bestemde meg for å prøve å få opp stemninga blant folket:

Throwing rocks and having a swingin' time, PONTO will sing a kill-song, probably out of tune, whilst smashing orkin skulls, trying to get the good folks of Hill Fort Codwallon to join in on the chorus.

Stones, to hit: 5, 18, 11, 10, 15, 16, 8
Stones, damage 5d6p: 28!!, 37!!!, 19!, 22!, 17, 19!, 15
Sword, to hit: 15, 29!, 24, 8, 20, 12, 16
Sword, damage 2d6p+3: 17!, 15!, 7, 17!!, 14!, 10, 10
Sword, defense: 18, 22, 11, 16, 18, 28 NPD, 13. Not including any cover bonuses from the wall.
Should anyone get on the wall and there is a clear line of sight, Pontoppidan will throw his javelins: 6, 2 dmg; 10, 6 dmg; 16, 8 dmg; 15, 3 dmg.

Frå inspirasjon til låt

Eg fekk ein rytme og ein melodi i hovudet mitt ganske snart etter dette, og byrja raskt å skrive på ein songtekst. Han kom lett og fint, og etter berre to timar hadde eg ein sang med fire vers og melodi til. Etter eit par revisjonar, ser han no slik ut:

Tiny-brained, an orc stood tall,
climbin’ up the wall.
On a-top the fightin’ folk
chanted on a joke:

‘Hi-ho, smash an orc!
Smother him with stones!
Hi-ho, with brains of pork,
he tumbles down and groans!’

Womenfolk and children cry
a joyous fight fanfare.
Orcish skum that clim’ up high,
would rather face a bear.

‘Hi-ho, smash an orc!
Smother him with stones!
Hi-ho, with brains of pork,
he tumbles down and groans!’

Fightin’ folk, we’ll stand our ground,
never yield and inch!
Orkish heads we’ll smash and pound,
we will never flinch!

‘Hi-ho, smash an ork!
Smother him with stones!
Hi-ho, with brains of pork,
he tumbles down and groans!’

When the battlefield is tain,
when the orks are slain,
we will dance upon their graves,
never we’ll be slaves!

‘Hi-ho, smash an orc!
Smother him with stones!
Hi-ho, with brains of pork,
he tumbles down and groans!’